my brother
Danny & Kidd
Darci (muy neice), Grandma, and Erin
Kettle River
Dan, Darci and Erin

Coming Home....

We drove to Kettle Falls, my hometown in Washington state and about 8-9 hour drive from Portland yesterday. Its my first trip home since my dad died last Christmas. One of the reasons for coming home is to have a graveside service for my dad and for my grandmother, who died a few months ago. I was thinking about how it might feel as we left Portland in the morning but honestly, all day I just kept falling asleep in the car. So I didn’t really resolve any feelings but as I slept the travel day was shortened.

Coming up to the drive way of the farm, I had a moment of reluctance -I’m not sure how else to describe the feeling. I’m pretty much a realist and believer of things happening for a reason and you can’t stop life - and death from happening. It doesn’t change the fact that my heart is breaking again knowing that we don’t have the opportunity to make new memories, that I can’t share the experiences i’ve had over the last 6 months in Haiti and that my kids miss their grandfather tremendously. Farm life has shaped my beliefs- its a circle of life, the cycle of seasons. The alfalfa had been cut, the bales hauled and the as the sprinklers rotate the spray of water, the sun reflects rainbows as we drive in the drive way. Life on the farm goes on, with the help of my brother, my niece and the neighbors, my mom is able to stay on the farm. After supper, we noticed the cows had gotten out and into the field across the creek. Some things just never change. Cows always want to know what is on the other side of the fence. I’m guessing that's where the saying the grass is greener...came from. So my dad isn’t here but everything around here is a measure of who he was so he doesn’t seem gone, just not here right now.

Today I practiced the art of doing nothing- Its not easy... I did answer a few emails on my phone and read a little, slept a little, read a little more, slept a little more, made supper....don’t think I can do nothing 2 days in a row...unless it involves the river and floating and Mike’s lemonade. Lets hope the weather cooperates.

Thursday: cloudy, windy, stormy, rainy, chilly....not warm enough to swim!

Friday: almost perfect day for the river....ahhhh!

Saturday: a beautiful day for the services. Family members arrived from Colorado and Seattle and afterwards we had a potluck dinner. Its such a bittersweet time to see family members you don’t see often. Another example, that life happens. I don’t see some of my relatives for years at a time. Maybe we will make more effort to stay in touch...or maybe not.

Tuesday....I spent the past two days lazing on air mattress’ floating around on the Kettle River with my cousins and just relaxing. Now we are leaving and heading back to Portland. It was a good trip~ good to see my mom is doing pretty well on her own. She has a good bunch of neighbors that are helping her and my brother keep up with the haying and general farm management. Its never enough time for visiting (and never enough river /cousin time). Certainly the river is not a warm as the Caribbean Sea but its clean crisp current is as soothing to the soul.

Leaving Haiti

Harder than I expected but at same time I’m very excited about seeing everyone at home. Nearly 6 months have gone by since I left Portland. Its seems like a long time yet has gone by pretty quickly because of the amount of work we have accomplished.

Last night Yasmine and Noel came by the house and took me out for a drink and we listened to some music, just for a little while knowing I would have to get up early. and since Noel was taking me to the airport, he would have to get up early too.

Lots of friends called yesterday and this morning to wish me safe travel, to remind me to tell all our Portland friends hello and to remind me that as I will be missed, I need to return.

I left my little dog, Gracie behind despite Al’s urging that I should take her to Portland with me. I’m pretty sure he was joking. And I’m positive he likes her better than the ‘pet’ rat running around his room at night. (secret: Al hates rats)

Since I arrived at the Port au Prince airport in January - the military had control of the airport and flgihts had to get approved to land and were given a 20 minute window to land and unload. We landed after midnight and there was no customs and immigration to go through. This morning as I left it was in the back of my mind that I didn’t have an entrance stamp in my passport or the ‘green’ card we are told not to lose. When they asked me about them I just said I arrived in January and they said Thank you and stamped my passport. The airport section I was in was in the process of up grading when I left last year so the finished area was quite nice, air conditioned. Shops up on 3rd level, but the main differene is the fact that you no longer walk out on to the tarmac to enter or exit the plane. Just walk down the ramp like every other airport.

I sat with a Haitian woman on my flight to Ft. Launerdale, She was very quiet but spoke some english and asked me to help her with the customs form. She was dressed very nicely in a beige dress as if going to a wedding but was going to visit her family. Stark contrast to the group of teenagers very casuallly attired in shorts, even my own capri’s. I remember my first trip in 2003, flying into Port au Prince from New York City- a very large plane very full of Haitians and when the plane touched the ground, a ‘spontaneous ‘ eruption of clapping, and thank you Jesus surprised out group. In all of the visits I’ve made since, I’ve not noticed it very often. Today, Marie Solange quietly clapped as we touhed down, gave me a little smile and said Thanks to God we are alive.

The flight to Dallas -Fort Wortth was divertered to Austin after circling and waiting for storm to pass - just to refuel and wait for storm to clear. I made it to the gate for Portland flight just as they were in boarding process. Unfortunately, other flights did not make their connection since we have many empty seats on a flight we were told was full. So I’m taking the time to write this and have some tea on my last leg of the flight home. I’ve mostly reflected on the changes in airline services over the years. Upon entering the plane in Port au Prince, I picked up a blanket and wrapped myself in it as the plane was freezing. Unfortunately, the blankets are only for the invisible people in first class and the flight attendent took it away from me. Sevice has changed yet my flight was quite expensive- you’d think I could use a blanket. They did ask the pilot to turn down the cold so that helped. The gave us a snack of raisens, 1 cracker and package of cheese. I had some yogurt in Ft. Laudedale. On the way to Dallas, I slept part of the way so if they had snacks, I didn’t get any but I was anticipating a long enough lay over to have some dinner. But that didn’t happen. Now on this last bit of journey, I could have the same snack I had this morning for $4 and I could buy a blanke for $8 ( I bought a sweatshirt in Ft. lauderale) and I could buy potato ships for $3.50. No thanks. I’ll visit Taco Bell on my way home in from airport tonight. The window is open after midnight.

Leaving Haiti

Harder than I expected but at same time I’m very excited about seeing everyone at home. Nearly 6 months have gone by since I left Portland. Its seems like a long time yet has gone by pretty quickly because of the amount of work we have accomplished.

Last night Yasmine and Noel came by the house and took me out for a drink and we listened to some music, just for a little while knowing I would have to get up early. and since Noel was taking me to the airport, he would have to get up early too.

Lots of friends called yesterday and this morning to wish me safe travel, to remind me to tell all our Portland friends hello and to remind me that as I will be missed, I need to return.

I left my little dog, Gracie behind despite Al’s urging that I should take her to Portland with me. I’m pretty sure he was joking. And I’m positive he likes her better than the ‘pet’ rat running around his room at night. (secret: Al hates rats)

Since I arrived at the Port au Prince airport in January - the military had control of the airport and flgihts had to get approved to land and were given a 20 minute window to land and unload. We landed after midnight and there was no customs and immigration to go through. This morning as I left it was in the back of my mind that I didn’t have an entrance stamp in my passport or the ‘green’ card we are told not to lose. When they asked me about them I just said I arrived in January and they said Thank you and stamped my passport. The airport section I was in was in the process of up grading when I left last year so the finished area was quite nice, air conditioned. Shops up on 3rd level, but the main differene is the fact that you no longer walk out on to the tarmac to enter or exit the plane. Just walk down the ramp like every other airport.

I sat with a Haitian woman on my flight to Ft. Launerdale, She was very quiet but spoke some english and asked me to help her with the customs form. She was dressed very nicely in a beige dress as if going to a wedding but was going to visit her family. Stark contrast to the group of teenagers very casuallly attired in shorts, even my own capri’s. I remember my first trip in 2003, flying into Port au Prince from New York City- a very large plane very full of Haitians and when the plane touched the ground, a ‘spontaneous ‘ eruption of clapping, and thank you Jesus surprised out group. In all of the visits I’ve made since, I’ve not noticed it very often. Today, Marie Solange quietly clapped as we touhed down, gave me a little smile and said Thanks to God we are alive.

The flight to Dallas -Fort Wortth was divertered to Austin after circling and waiting for storm to pass - just to refuel and wait for storm to clear. I made it to the gate for Portland flight just as they were in boarding process. Unfortunately, other flights did not make their connection since we have many empty seats on a flight we were told was full. So I’m taking the time to write this and have some tea on my last leg of the flight home. I’ve mostly reflected on the changes in airline services over the years. Upon entering the plane in Port au Prince, I picked up a blanket and wrapped myself in it as the plane was freezing. Unfortunately, the blankets are only for the invisible people in first class and the flight attendent took it away from me. Sevice has changed yet my flight was quite expensive- you’d think I could use a blanket. They did ask the pilot to turn down the cold so that helped. The gave us a snack of raisens, 1 cracker and package of cheese. I had some yogurt in Ft. Laudedale. On the way to Dallas, I slept part of the way so if they had snacks, I didn’t get any but I was anticipating a long enough lay over to have some dinner. But that didn’t happen. Now on this last bit of journey, I could have the same snack I had this morning for $4 and I could buy a blanke for $8 ( I bought a sweatshirt in Ft. lauderale) and I could buy potato ships for $3.50. No thanks. I’ll visit Taco Bell on my way home in from airport tonight. The window is open after midnight.

During the week and especially when I am riding in the van to go somewhere, I often think of or see something that I want to share in my blog. But then the business of the week pushes out those thoughts. I really need a recorder don't I?
So what is new in my world... a new addition to security: We are still testing names but latest is Gracie. She came via John's neighborhood and Lorne brought her home. She is about 10 weeks old and she is Haitian mutt and very sweet. She whines a little when she has to go outside like she did about midnight last night. Apparently she is smart enough and self taught not to pee in the house! What a good little puppy! She hasn't learned to bark yet and has greeted strangers with a doggie smile. She has been following me back and forth as I move back to the apartment today. I have electricity connection now but still no water. I'm heating water in an 'outdoor' camping shower bag to see how that works. Otherwise it will be bucket showers for awhile.

We got the pool cleaned and painted this week~ now we just need water. Poor John had to go all over town to find the paint. I was hoping that the truck would come today and bring us enough water to fill it. Obviously, it is more urgent for our well being than for his - we are on the list of lesser importance. We will still plan for poolside party even without water for the 4th of July.

Brazil lost which made for a lot of disappointed Haitians; Argentina lost this morning. It sounded like I was in the center of the soccer stadium for all of the cheering surrounding us in the neighborhood. One would have thought they had won the championship! I guess they were Brazil fans and happy that Argentina lost. I'm not sure now who I am supposed to cheer for....doesn't help the matter that I don't even know who is playing. Of course I won't admit that to any Haitians.

We had the remnants of a tropical storm earlier in the week. Wind and rain but while it didn't affect us much, the people in the camps and living in tents are miserable enough without added storm worries. The radio continues to tell people to find a more permanent shelter but there is little available that is affordable for the tens of thousand that need it. There are organizations in Haiti that are trying to build permanent structure shelters that will withstand cyclones but there are not enough. Many peoples homes are still in a pile of rubble. People are tired of waiting for government to clear the way so they are chipping away at the cement and cutting rebar. Piles of it sit in the street waiting to be hauled away. Teams of men and women in blue or yellow t-shirts indicating cash for work programs earn $5 day breaking up rubble and hauling it to the street in buckets and wheelbarrows. Its hard work, heavy work and temperatures in high 90's. People need work to house, feed and send their children to school. Generally, most people renting rooms, apartments or houses demand 6 - 12 months rent in advance. A 1 room apartment with a toilet may cost $150 US for a year but its very difficult to save that much in advance if you are trying to support your family on $5/ day. How do the thousands of unemployed people estimated at 70-80% do that without income? People beg for help, a hand out or a hand up. There is lots of food available if one can afford to buy it. School is open if one can afford to send the children. Healthcare available. We need to employ the Haitians to give them the opportunity to provide adequately for their families. I read that Taiwan is sending 200 tons of rice to Haiti. I read that over a million meals are being packaged in the US by a church to bring down to feed the starving people. I wish they would send their $ resources to Haiti to have Haitians provide the meals for the starving people with Haitian food. There are some places where food is abundant on the streets and places its not so available. If someone had the resources to package food from one area to deliver to another area there might be less starvations and a few more jobs. Haitians help other Haitians all the time. They just need a little more help right now to do it.